Diagrams, Charts & More!

So I've been trying to take it easy since my ankle decided that it lost the will to live. I'm mostly scared that I won't be able to play in the summer games. I wouldn't worry under normal circumstances but I know if I hurt it in the tournament I won't stop playing because I'm too competitive. I thought that swimming would maybe be easier on my ankle? 

I kicked off the week by swimming on Monday. Good workout. I swam 800 straight. It was a lot harder than I remembered. I think there is some information to be extrapolated from this experience...

As you may have noticed I realized my blog needs more diagrams. Since I'm a chemistry major so things like this are pretty much second nature for me. Can't you tell?

I wanted to do something fun and new for my workout on Friday. Courtney suggested I swim backwards in the lazy river (I couldn't tell if she was serious or not). I thought it was an incredibly fun idea so I thought I'd give it a go. Obviously my swim was an interesting one. As such is typical on a Friday afternoon the pool was busy.  I found that there were other things in the lazy river with me, including a free floating small plastic unrealistically skinny toy doll. I got away with swimming (weaving) through the cyclically oncoming traffic for a while. But eventually I retired to the lap pool where I completed a very good swim, maybe my best yet.

I swam quite a bit once I got into the lap pool, like 1300 yards total. I felt awesome. Lounging in the warmth outside next to my sun kissed, swimsuit wearing wife also made me feel awesome. Overall a very good day.

I have a gift.

How long is a mile?

Lets state the obvious here.
1 mile = 5280 feet

...but feet are lame and everyone uses them to measure things. There are other ways to measure miles, such as the length of various things lined up in a row.
264 dead giraffes
8470.23 number 2 pencils
3.54 Empire State Buildings
You get the picture. For fun I will randomly refrain from using the word (mile) and will instead replace it with another equally valid term representing a mile.


This week I discovered just how long a (1508.5 extended lightsabers) actually is. On my run this Wednesday (which was originally going to be a swim, but after 15 minutes of standing in my swim trunks on the beach of the lake terrified of the onlookers I chickened out), I wanted to run 3 (1400 running steps). I knew that I COULD do it because I've done it before. So I decided to run from the UPS Store down around SUU and back. My first mistake was *hoping* it would be three miles. My phone gives me neat-o updates when I run; telling me the time, the distance and my pace for the previous (1.03 the elevation of Denver, CO). It announced the first mile and I felt awesome. Then I kept running...and running, every few steps hoping it would announce the last (6669 iPads). Finally as I entered the long home stretch it announced my second mile. I looked down this long road and thought to myself "That's probably a mile, I'll go that far". I hope you read that in Joey from Friends super sexy and suave voice because that's how I said it in my head, both because that's often how I speak to myself and also because I was slightly delirious at this point. Well needless to say towards the end of my long road the thought occurred to me that I wasn't going to make this last mile. I decided to to Taco time. Surely that would be far enough. When I arrived, no dice. I was tired, so I decided to run back to the UPS Store and if that wasn't far enough then I would just call it good. When arriving at the the store I checked my phone and I had gone 2.91 mi. Seriously? I couldn't end like that so I ran to the end of the parking lot and back and I had broken three (1.7 Burj Khalifa). Take that Ethan Hunt.

This gave me an idea for a run so spectacularly fun and awesome I don't even want to ruin the surprise and tell you what I'm planning on as my idea for a run that's spectacularly fun and awesome.

Unfortunately life happened this week. My wife (and mom and dad) all got violently sick the beginning of the week and I sprained my ankle at the best concert of my life (Thrice, may you rest in peace). The ankle thing is awful news because the USG Frisbee tourney is in two weeks and I need to be better by then. So lots of ice and unfortunately I need to rest. I guess you guys will have to wait for my awesome fun run idea 'till I get better.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT:
Some people are born to run, like Cam Levins. Talk about a talented kid. He goes to SUU, won the national championships of "People Who Run Alot" (tee hee) and now he's racing with the Canadian National team at the Olympics? What an awesome guy, more here.

Death Swim

So swimming is sometimes a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. The college pool is pretty much closed for the summer and that's a problem because I need to practice swimming. I thought to myself "Hey there's a new lake on Leigh Hill and I need to learn to swim in open water. I'll swim there and knock out two birds with one stone!"

...I soon realized the incapacitating and crippling effects cold water has on your muscles. I had seen people in speedos jump off glaciers into arctic water before on TV. I think it was on like a Claratin or Visine commercial. They make it look so easy! I probably swam about 50m before I felt like Crabbe and Goyle after they'd been drugged with a sleeping draught cleverly put in chocolate cake by Hermione. After another 75m and I was exactly half way between shorelines, completely frozen and immobilized. I was forced to start treading water. It didn't make a difference if I kept swimming or turned back I knew I wasn't going to make it without extreme difficulty...if I could make it back at all.

Things were looking bleak to say the least.

(Please pause to form a mental image of me in the middle of the lake. Here are a couple of things you can put in your mental image: dark storm clouds looming, me dipping below the water slightly due to lack of endurance or constitution, winds picking up, sharks circling below, large waves are popular, also lightening could be involved.)

Are there tears in your eyes because you're scared for me yet? This is how I felt. As I tread water I turned to find that I had swam off course and was about 25 feet from shore where everyone was staring at this idiot who had attempted (and failed) at swimming across the lake. This wasn't a normal crowd of people either. It was "Rent-A-Free-Kayak-At-The-Lake-Day" where there was a radio station broadcasting as well as several business who had set up tents giving away free stuff. So there were tons of people with their kids on shore enjoying the lake and I had caught the attention of most of them...and there was a 12 year old about 15 feet from me (staring at me)(I could practically stand up where I had stopped)...and there were about 20 kayaks on the lake and three of them had started paddling slowly towards me in case something happened (also staring at me).

Is embarrassed too strong a word?

This week was still a sub par week to be honest with an average sized run and a good sized bike ride. Special shout out to my friend K.T. for letting my borrow his nice mountain bike for my ride, even though it's WAY too big for me. I started a job at the school this week. I think I'm going to have to start working out in the mornings...bleh. Well there's more I could talk about but the swimming story was the best one. I'm going to start posting bi-weekly so I can share all the awesomely awful things that happen to me as I try to turn myself into an athlete. The song from Mulan "I'll Make a Man Out of You" just got stuck in my head...

Heavyweight Athletes

So guess what? Turns out I'm not the biggest person who's done a triathlon. Flipping through triathlon blogs I found posts flush with people 200+ even 250+ lbs. In fact a 400 pound national title sumo wrestler recently finished the Los Angeles Marathon with a time of 11:52:11. Tell me that's not awesome. His next goal is to swim the English Channel! I'm not saying that being overweight is a good thing but I am saying that even if you don't fit into the cookie cutter 165 lb, 6'1" man you can still be fit. Some of us can only work with what we were born with.

*Please note experts consider a height to weight chart to be grossly inaccurate and it is used here only for farcical purposes.

Hey at least I'm not "Extremely Overweight."


This week wasn't the best week ever. I'm finding it difficult to work towards playing frisbee in the upcoming Utah Summer Games and train for a triathlon. That being said here's the report for this week:

 What do you see? I see little training and lots of frisbee. Not a bad thing unless you plan on doing a triathlon...which I do. I need to figure something out.

Alright I've figured something out. I will run, swim and bike on Monday, Wednesday and Friday respectively. Also if I have to work on Saturday mornings (which happens often) I will pick the event that I did the worst at that week and do it again. This might not be the best plan in the world but it's simple and I like it.

Let the Games Begin

Some time ago, possibly a couple months, I got it in my head I was going to complete a triathlon. I thought "If now, when?" I've always wanted to run a marathon but for my body type I think a triathlon is a more plausible goal.

So I've done some training so far. I knew I could run and bike but swimming definitely didn't come naturally to me. I can comfortably bike about 10 miles and can comfortably run about five steps. My body never wants to run but during an average workout I can do about 2-3 miles. But swimming is a bit of a demon. How are you supposed to breathe with your face in the water?!? My wife is an outstanding swimmer. I employed her help in swim training with me and this week I'm proud to announce that I swam my first 750 yds straight (without stopping to catch my breath). This is the length of the swim portion of my triathlon! I felt accomplished but after doing some research in what's involved in a triathlon today I realized I have a LOT more work to do before I'm prepared.

Since I don't know what the typical layout of each post will be or how often they will be (once a week maybe?) I'll just wing it with this one.

Current weight:

• 246 lbs

Good things I did last week:

• Swam 750 yds straight

          Ok I didn't really workout much else. I need to come up with a plan/schedule.

Future goals / things to work on this week:

• Run a 5k